Incognito in Saint Louis

Slowly unleashing the secrets of city life.

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Insane Wedding Update

So, this wedding that I'm in is a little less than four months away. I've finally conferred with the Maid of Honor and we have both the bridal shower and bachelorette party ironed out. Whew!

Just when I was high off the fumes of my burning my proscrastination and actually planning something for this wedding, I get an e-mail stating that our HAIR appointments have been made for the wedding date. The wedding is four months away and the hair appointments are made. Four months. Four. FOUR!

At this point, I have to wonder what her time is consisting of if she is planning our hair appointments 4 months in advance.

What makes me the angriest is myself. The reason that I say that is why can't I just fucking get over it and be happy for her already? What in the hell is preventing me from just biting the bullet, sucking it up, and at least feigning interest in this wedding???

I'm not personally all that rah rah on marriage or weddings, but normally, I can at least be a bit excited (I've been in roughly 8 million weddings) and this will probably be the last for awhile (that would include my own) that I will be in, if I'm ever in another wedding at all. You think I would be nostalgic about all that tafeta. Nothing. I'm a freaking robot in this whole matter.

I think part of it is I can't let go of the fact that I think that the entire thing is a lie. Here fiancee is an ass and she has a daughter that will be subjected to this example that living with an asshole is how it should be. It pisses me off because her mother did the same thing and we grew up together and she hated that shit and I thought she knew better. She's wrapped her entire life course into this worthless, selfish, bitter jackass. I think she deserves better.

I think the other part is that she used to be a fun, interesting person to talk to and now its all wedding, baby. I can't get into it. I've tried my whole life and I just don't give a shit about all that stuff.

I better just let it go and realize we are all here to live our lives in our own fashion so that I can release this rebellion that I have in my gullet for this affair.


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